Allright.. I'm exited.. finally get to round up the boyz for a bros nite out. Its been a while since we all get together. Last time we did that was 2 years ago at the curve, the gardens restaurant...
I remembered that day, one of my friend was complaining bout this girl "A" for playing with him and mentioned on a girl "B" who actually hinted that she likes him but he doesnt want to betray his love for girl "A".
I was like " what??? screw girl A . She is just playing with you, just want the attention, so to hell with her.. better go for girl "B". I was single back then and so was he.
Now 2 years later... we will all meet at the same place, this saturday 9pm 31st march 2012. the difference is, one of my friends, the one mentioned above, is now already married with girl B and is expecting a child this May. hahaha.. and I am still single... dont know whether to laugh or cry ...
But its good that we all get to meet up and party!. Leave the wife and child at home, trust me and let me take you back to "The dark side"... Muahahahhahahahaha..... (they always get scared when I'm in one of my crazy..all out moods)
Lets see whos the lucky chic this time.... hehehehehe...
I've never felt this EEEEVVVIIILLLL in a very long time .....
watched hunger games... it was allright... some may thought its an original concept since it was based in a book but there is a japanese movie callbattle royal 2001 i think which is very similar. for me hunger games is a holywood-tized version of battle royal. its pretty good nonetheless.
one thing i like about the movie is that the heroine is hot.. not so much in terms of beauty(eventhough she is quite hot looking) but more of her strong natured personality.its rare that i watched movies with female heroes as lead casts. but i like this one.
its rare to see a strong woman like that. not muscular strong but strong willed. jarang la i see that in malaysian women. most of them are too much focused on themselves and how they look. a lil bit of attitude is fun ...
ok im bored actually. its 1.07am but im still in a meeting... bummer..
(writing from my tab so forgive the typos and such)
"I'm not going to tell the story the way it happened. I'm going to tell it the way I remember it."
Cycled for a measly 10 kilometres just now.. Need to
let go of some steam… anyways,
Everyone should have some sort of defining
moments that shapes them to be what they are now.Mine started with this story called… “Great Expectations”.
How do I say this, I felt the presence of this
thing so called “love” at quite a late age. During my childhood days, My dad
left my mom when I was 5 and for a few good years my mom had her own way of
dealing with the situation which causes all my siblings including me to be
somewhat independent in the things we do. My mom was doing what she can to cope
with the pain of my dad leaving her and I don’t blame her for doing what she
had to do.
When I was in primary school, I never
understood why girls give me stuff. They gave me little cute looking notebooks,
chocolates and candies. Because I did not understand their intentions, I replied
by throwing gold dust on them(hair)… and of course.. they cried and I
laughed.At that age, I was only
interested in Transformers figurines and playing video games. I only started
liking girls or start to develop feelings for them when I was 14, after I read
that book called great expectations.
Kids nowadays however,umur 10 tahun dah
tahu pasal boyfriend and girlfriend.By then,
they would have already have a girlfriend or boyfriend and by 11-12 they should
have experienced their first breakup…Those years I don’t know shite about any of that. (Now it seems I know too much..ehem.. moving on..)
It was during an English class that we were
given an assignment to read a book and write a summary of it. I guess that was
the first time I step foot in a library to look for the thinnest english
novel I could find.Somehow I stumbled
upon Great Expectations which was created by Charles Dickens , a British
author (lets pronounce British as the brits do shall we ,… BRE’-ISH..haha). So I took the book and read it.
The story is about a boy named Pip and a
girl named Estella. (If I do get married
and have baby girls, I would name them Estella ‘something’ and Anezka‘something’. Why Estella?, because I was so
moved by great expectations, Why Anezka? Well… let’s just leave that
explanation for some other day). Pip, a poor boy, due to some unforeseen
events met with Estella(a young rich girl
under the care of and old unmarried woman). This old woman has a goal for
Estella. You see, this old woman was ditch during her own wedding day and ever
since then she became crazy and wore the same wedding dress every day for years till
she died. Her goal was to train Estella to become cold hearted, to not feel
heartbroken as she did so she trained her and Pip was one of the tools used in
the training.
She organized as such that they(Pip and
Estella) would spend as much timetogether until Pip develop feelings for her that he can no longer keep
to himself. This takes place for a few years till they both become young
adults. It was after this was revealed that she(the old woman) decided to the
break his heart by transferring Estella to another city and says to Pip that
Estella is not meant for him, and she will never be his. Estella by this time
had become quite the cold hearted bitch after years of training by her mentor,
but she did still feel something for Pip though when they were together but
couldn’t understand what the feeling meant.
Cutting the story short, Pip grew up and accumulates
a lot of wealth, while Estella got married to some schmuck which later left her
and her little kid sometime later.In
the end, Pip and Estella found each other again in the old mansion where they
first met, not so young anymore(mid 30’s) but they did get what they have
always wanted, which is to be together.
After reading this I was like ..waaa. The
story is not for young kids especially not for somebody who’s 14 at the time back in 1997, It’s not like a
normal love story you see nowadays because its more complex and mature. Not
many would appreciate such story, but I did. I think a year after that in 1998,
The movie Great Expectations came out starring my favourite hottie at the time Gwyneth
Palthrow and Ethan Hawke.It was a good
movie, again not your typical romance films but it was just as good as the
book. You should watch it if you haven’t and if you like it as well then let me
know ;). More variation of great expectations were made. The latest was a short
British mini series which came out late last year, Just as good but the girl
tak lawa sangat la (tak lawa langsung
actually).
"She'll only break your heart, it's a fact. And even though I warn you,
even though I guarantee you that the girl will only hurt you terribly,
you'll still pursue her. Ain't love grand?'
So,I guess you can say that I never had
what a typical normal kid should have during childhood, a good happy family,
watching tv together and laughing together during dinner time or something like
that but I did cherish every moment and made the best of what I’ve got.
Whenever I go to family gatherings, especially if I am seated at the dinner
table, I feel uncomfortable simply because I am not used to the whole
environment, even till now. It is good to know not many have experienced what I
have and it should remain that way. Some of us are fortunate to already know and
felt love when they were young, taught
and shown by their parents. Whereas, there exist people like myself that has to
search on his own to find out what is it all about.
Sometimes I wonder, maybe it is true that I
still don’t know what love is. Maybe it is true that I suck in relationships
and maybe it’s true that during my search for this thing called “love”, I get
burned many times. However, maybe…just
maybe, because of all the painful experiences I have felt from
understanding what love is, from a child perspective after witnessing what my
dad did to my mom, from a sibling perspective when my older brother passed
away, from a friend perspective when one of my really good friend betrays my
trust and from my own personal experiences going thru relationships makes me a
person who would in the end ..appreciate Love the most, to understand that if
you do not go the distance, make an effort or sacrifices to make it work, then it
probably won’t and that trust is about believing in each other till the
very end despite all odds. Perhaps that’s why I am able to translate what I
have experienced unto words and expressions so that others don’t have to go
thru what I had to, when I have been
there and they have not.
“How can you really appreciate the taste of
something sweet if you haven’t fully experienced the taste of sour? “
Okay enough of that..Oh
yea.. I haven’t told you about the first(and only) horrific blind date I
had..next post la I share…;)
Jem singing Missing You... nice song to listen to during this late hour.
Let me tell you something. I'm good at dodging questions that I don't want to answer. Before this I've never actually thought much about it but I realize that whenever I feel certain questions will be thrown at me, I would quickly go on auto mode and deflect the subject or question with the same question or change the subject all together.
I never realize that till recently.. shite..
I think its because, all this time I appear to be the guy with all the answers, the one people lean to when they have problems or need someone to talk to. I guess in order to be that shoulder to cry on for somebody, I cant show my own problems or weaknesses or else how am I suppose to help that person if he or she sees me as equally weak, right?
Been thinking about it and if someone were to look at me in the eyes and ask these questions directly at me then I would be jammed! damn.. even the thought of that scenario happening is scary..
Top 3 (eye to eye) scariest questions I fear people would asked me
1. What do you really want?
2. What is love to you?
3. What are you hiding?
Damn.. those are the 3 most scariest questions someone can ask me.. come to think of it.. I inspire my friends and colleagues to go for it but when I think about it, I don't even know what I reeeeaaally want. I advice people on love issues when I cant even make my relationship last. I teach people to always go for eye to eye contact whenever talking to a person to show you have nothing to hide when I myself am afraid to do that..
ahh screw that ... I'm safe...just keep doing what I do..
Weekend is here... Wont be posting anything else till Monday.. is Hunger Games out yet? Man... Im running out of "single" friends.. bila ajak lepaq je.. aku ada hal dengan family, Isteri aku ni lah, Anak aku ni lah... Chill la people.. girls I understand la if wanna marry young but guys..come on belum 30 dah nak settle down, atleast reach 30 first lah guys then have that thought, don't la leave me hanging, what ever happen to the bros before hoes principle?... As Barney Stinson from HIMYM would say... " All my friends are either getting married or getting a kid... and I'm just getting more awesome.." Haha I wish... Haih.. Gotta make more friends then... Anyone interested to fill in that position ?.. movie partner pun jadi lah ..
I was forced to watch this movie called Cinderella story starring Hillary Duff, but in the end it wasn't all that bad.. considering I manage to hear this song.. boleh lah. Here I attached the video clip with snippets from the movie incase you might be interested in watching the movie one day.
I just got back from playing bowling with ma buddies. Scored a measly 120 first game and 108 second game.. actually not bad la considering the last time I played bowl was like 2 -3 years ago. However, I would trade bowl anytime for mid valley just now.. dammmmmit...
So when I played bowling just now ma friend came up to me and express his feelings about his relationship with his gf and how to take things to the next level (A.K.A proposing to his gf). WHY do I get this kind of people coming to me. Aku nak je cakap "Oi mamat, Ko sedar tak aku ni tak kahwin lagi dan awek pun takda..asal nak tanya aku soalan soalan yang berbentuk misteri pada aku?"If only la kan... but instead I answered.. "Ohh wow, that great man... heres what you do... "
Haih..
On to another story, her latest posts was interesting... had a vid clip there.. damn.. the vid clip nailed it for me la I tell you.. I wanted to comment on her post but stopped myself cause I got nothing constructive to say except.. "So Fcking Hot la You" hahaha but not my style lar to comment like that so I just keep quiet. I guess that's the closest I get to actually seeing her in real life..
In which after watching her video, I was wondering... jeng jeng jeng... another "WHAT IF" scenario. You see peeps, In case you dont know, most men like to imagine themselves in a particular situation with the girl they like....... not that kind of imagination la, aiyoh. I mean situation or scenario which works more like a forecasting kind of thing, thinking if they had done this or done that, then would that girl fall for them kind of imaginary thoughts. Its been a while since I had imagine things like this but since this is a blog and no one knows who I really am then what the hell.. lets dream out loud shall we... Oookay lets begin
So lets say I like that girl right now.. I could possibly imagine 4 types of scenario in which I have a chance of winning her heart. This is going to be a one way perspective thing la coz I dont know how she is like on each scenario but lets just play this out...
Scenario 1 : High school
Okay, assuming she and I were in the same high school.. me being myself in high school. first off,
1)Would I fall for her? HELL yes.
2)Can I win her heart? Hmmm... I am about 90% sure that I can .. not because I am a player or super terer in getting girls but bcoz in high school, my trump card would be my honesty and sincerity towards just wanting her for her and not some trophy gf or something. I also would stand out from the rest of the boys, not because I purposely stand out or anything but more of my good records, positions I hold and overall positive outlook.
3)Conclusion: Yes we could be together back then. but probably her being as hot as she is, guys would do anything to take her from me in which I'm pretty much sure we would end up breaking up. Its not that I don't like competition but its just that at that age I'm already planning ahead on getting married and shit like that and I'm serious about it. However, I know that wont be her plan because girls like that, would want to explore the world first before settling down. That's the fine line that will cause our separation.
Scenario 2 : College
Hah! college time.. my training ground to become the perfect assassin to steal women's hearts. lets see how this scenario plays out.
1)Would I fall for her ? HELL yes (why would that ever change?, haha)
2)Can I win her heart? hmm tough one. College time, You get a lot of buaya's lurking.. each with their own trump cards.. If I were to meet her in college, I would say there is a 50% chance of success of winning her heart. Why? because other buaya's have flashy cars and have loads of money. I however am just an average guy with a simple car. I'm not complaining la since I can get girls without all that flashy things, but from my days in college, guys with flashy cars and have loads of money tend to have the upper hand in getting girls, and there's no way their chick radar would miss someone like her.
3)Conclusion: Assuming I do manage to win her heart, hmm I would say we would last maybe for 1 year or 2 MAX. Why? Its college! Would you wanna spend the best moments in life(aka college) just with 1 dude? mula mula happy la kot but after a while she would be like.. macam terasa terkongkong even though shes not.
Scenario 3 : Work Place
This is the time I am fully loaded. The perfect assassin.
1)Would I fall for her ? Man... the moment she first step foot at the office, I know I would end up changing from following the company's mission statement to my own personal mission statement which to get her at all costs. Haha
2)Can I win her heart? Definitely(not sounding cocky ya, this is just a imaginary scenario based on real facts about me). I have never failed in getting the girls I like from work to be with me(hmm I may have given you guys the wrong kind of impression here..don't judge pls :) ) Why do I think I will succeed? Because my work place is usually working towards my advantage. I would probably have a good high ranking position in which I am personally looked upon as a good leader and worker, so naturally I can work my way towards getting close to her. I would probably be knowledgeable and the "go to guy" when problem arises in which she would naturally come to me for assistance and I would gladly help her. Couple that with some "off work relationship building" and it should work.
3)Conclusion: I think this scenario gives me the best chance of being with her. However, It still wont work out still ! WHY? because, she would probably want to keep the relationship private, from office mates and the secrecy will drag all the way unto not telling her family about me as well. We would probably survive for a few years before she starts to feel that somethings amiss and slowly pushes herself away from me(change jobs maybe)
Scenario 4 : Lets just wing it
My fun yet rarely used(fear factor) weapon. This is an open scenario in which I randomly meet her somewhere and am about to make my move
1)Would I fall for her? Of course, why else would I use the "Lets wing it and see what happens" card
2)Can I win her heart ? errrr Nope. Difficult la to leave a good impression if she don't know anything about me before I make my move.
3)Conclusion: Gone case. I would probably end up making a fool of myself..
Shite.... in all scenarios, even though its all imaginary, I would fail. Dammmit... Has my Imagination gone soo bad that its mixed up with reality? Haih... Okay so how bout in reality then.. how would I fair out in getting her?
Well lets see... first of, we are not the same in age terms(+7 years apart). Second, her world is totally different than mine. The crowd she hangs out with, her family background and her status. Thirdly, We may be staying in adjacent locations but there is no way we could ever bump onto each other, let alone get to know one another. Even if we manage to pass all three points and things are looking all bright and shiny for us, the fourth factor and most critical point that will stop her at her tracks is that she won't be able to accept the other half of me( its not like I killed anyone or I am partially crazy or anything but lets put it this general way, Its a common fact everybody has a devilish side and angelic side in them... so lets just say... she would fall for only one side of me)
So hmmm...reality sucks more than the imaginary scenarios right? In military aspects, its mission impossible. There was a time when there's ever a so called mission impossible, I would jump right into the middle of it, I don't know why but I guess it has something to do with the fact that I just cant sit idle and HOPE for things to happen. I'd go out there and make it happen.. even if it comes with a high risk. I just hate "what if's".
But..Ive had enough of stupid actions following what my heart tells me to do, always getting burned in the end.. and at that time my brains says " I told you so" . I should probably listen to you now eh..
"Never let the fear of striking out keeps you from playing the game" -Riggghhhttt... I'll pass, thanks
You know whut? I used to kutuk my friends for having blogs, saying they should get a life "like me" instead. I never understood why people write or even read blogs.. its just a bunch of personal ramblings by someone. I'm more of a face 2 face so I can be totally in control kinda guy...and now look at me, sitting here and writing this !!! Bah hambug..
Anyways, speaking of blogs, I'm kinda into this particular blog for a few reasons. I wont deny nor would tell you some sophisticated reasons why I like reading her blog so lets get straight to the why shall we,
As the number states, First reason is the fact that shes smoking hot, I would not go around the bush on this one. I like her statement on her FB, something about "you can be beautiful but not loved but you cant love without being beautiful". I'll be honest, beauty is what attracts me first to a person but its her personality and character is what makes a relationship last. Though some people may not agree with her statement, its easy if they understand the term, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.
Next is the comments she gets from her posts. I mean, you got to see it for yourself. Its amusing. Maybe its just me but her commentators, the way they comment is as if she is a little kid. "Auww so cute", "Chomel la you nieh", "masa you kechik mesti kiut", "you suka chocolate juga, I pun suka" "eh chocolate tu halal ker" kind of comment. Hahaha, everytime I comment of one of her posts, and read thru the other comments, I would ask myself if I am on the right blog as this sounds like some kindergarten peeps commenting on each other. But when I look back at the main page and saw her pic, I'm like... yea..... I'm in the right page ;). Well.. I wont say much since her total fans/readers is like 10,000% percent more than mine so yea... I'll just shut up.
Thirdly, its the topics she posts. This woman can write very interestingly I tell ya. Some of her topics are really good,even got me thinking(not easy to do this to me okay) but some of them is just errr how do I say it... Not my type of tea la.. Other people layan la those posts but as much as I want to participate in her posts, bila baca je terus takda idea apa nak tulis. So when I visit her blog for new posts, I pretty much anticipate the topic she would post.
Speaking of her blog, At one time I randomly browse thru her posts and saw she put up a topic about surviving breakups. Its was like last year, probably from her own experience from her eX, number I dunno, 10 maybe.. but who cares(ain't judgin coz I know what that feels like when you are being judged upon), but one question I have in my head was.."whos stupid enough to break up with her? the F8&K?".. but I know these type of situations all too well... people have said those things on my past relationships before as well. So, I decided to jump in and write a comment about it and offer my list of songs to hear from when a breakup happens. The thing is... As I was writing the lyrics and song titles, somehow it triggers back all those memories of my past relationships... Its pretty sad actually.. I don't know, but her topic made me relive those moments which I would prefer not to remember. It goes back to the "Where did I go wrong?" thought process. Hmmmmm...
Thats why I put up this song by Nidji -Dosakah Aku. Probably you would think the song doesn't fit the topic at first, but the reason is here. This videoclip and song is about a couple determine to make it work when all else around them is against it. In this videoclip, the guy loves the girl despite the fact that she is pregnant with somebody else's kid and the father of the child refuses to acknowledge the fact that he got her pregnant. So the guy took care of her and loved her, even when everyone was against it. He was by her side all the time till she passed away...
I dont know why but when I wrote the comment on her blog this song came to mind.... Why? because the videoclip scenario reminds me of someone...
I have been waiting for this,
The return of a feeling that I miss.
Discover me and give me a sign,
That one day you will unlock this heart of mine.
Thinking of the day I find you,
My dreams will finally come true.
Now then, what must I do,
To make you see this too.
That you and I, it will be an adventure,
And we will waltz thru these times together.
I will be your sword and cut away your fear,
while you be the sheath that holds me, my dear.
To the one that I will find,
Know that one day, your heart will be with mine.
How do I tell you, how can I make you see,
That it is when I find you , that I will find me.
Hahaha, My friends back then in MMU wonders what I do when I'm in front of the pc. Whether I am studying really hard or chatting with some chic over the internet. Well, they are right at times but there's also one more thing I like to do but I couldn't tell them at that time because I know they wont believe me, no one would. So after years of keeping it a secret, I guess its safe to tell it here now.
D Day is over.. We did it. We are the champions... the rest of the teams did good.. but it was a battle between the best, and unfortunately for them, "the warriors" had an angel in the ranks...they had no chance since the beginning... its was pure ownageee....
Now I can rest for a while... too much time spent on this competition already. Here, I share the secret to our success. May this 6 minute clip from this movie teach you some important lessons as it has taught me. Whatever you do, if you are into sports, whether you want to have your own business, whether your exam is just around the corner and you have been burning the midnight oil, whether you are sad or stress over something that has happen,whether life has been hard on you, or whether others have been trying to bring you down... no matter what....
Yesterday, something good happened. A friend's wife contacted me, explaining her situation to me and how she should deal with it. You see, her husband is quite a religious person, teaching religious subject to people and often when he does his duty for god, he would always bring his wife with him. I know him, a very nice and honest guy.
His wife is also a nice person, always wanting to marry a person with good religious background, someone that could lead the family. She got what she wanted, but she did not expect her husband to be sort of a proactive person when it comes to religion. He believes it is his duty as a person, husband and most importantly as god's humble servant to give as much for god as he could, saying the amount of time we allocate for HIM daily wasn't enough for the things he has given to us. It makes perfect sense to me as I am one of the people who understood his intentions and actions well enough to support what he is doing.
His wife however, is feeling the burden of having to follow her husband around as a support. Yes, one option would be for her to just stay at home but being just married, women like to know where her husband is at most of the time, especially at night correct? hence why her husband also wants her to come along, see him do what he does.She didn't say she wanted to leave him but hinted that she feels heavy to what her husband is doing.
I told her that she should talk to her husband about this and she did, stating that she knows what her husband is doing is not wrong its just that, what he does,does not match her daily regime, she is not use to doing what he does, she can choose to stay at home but being home alone when her husband is out at night is not something newly weds would like to do and that's when she asked for my opinion.
I said nicely to her, saying that she should be lucky her husband is not doing anything that would break her trust towards him, ie- sleeping with another woman, gambling, stealing ,etc etc. I also said that its rare to get somebody who values religion so much as that is a great quality to have as a father and a husband and I know that he just wants the best for you and your future kids, he wanted to set a good example being a good husband, a good worker and a good servant of god. I said that he could not ask for a better partner to accompany him in doing what he does and it is something you should be proud of as many other women out there sadly finds out too late that they could not find the same qualities in their husband. A lot of people can claim they are religious and can be a good example to the family but only a few shows it with action.
In the end I said to her, do not worry about your husband. He will either follow prophet Noah's history or prophet Muhammad's history in which in Noah's history, his wife chose not to follow him whereas in Muhammad's history, his wife followed him till her end. Its up to you to choose which Sunnah you want your husband to be in, in which both guarantees her husband's place in heaven.
She paused for a moment and replied, "you are right. One of the reason I married him because of his religious qualities, something that he has and I do not, which would make him somebody who could lead the family. I have never fought with him, he has never shown me any kind of distrust and I know he loves me. I will find a way to work things out with him". " ...Then you have found the answer to your question" I replied.
One good deed amongst the mountain-full of bad deeds.. you've got a long way to go mate! - to myself..haha
Its been a while since I heard this song.This song has a weird title, almost obscene if you ask me. This is one those one hit wonders and again not many would have known this song, so here you go, a song just for you. Cant believe a person like you like to stir dodol.. I mean seriously, shouldn't people like you follow the norm and hang out with popular guys, go to clubs and do stuff typical mods like you would? Its how I cant seem to figure you out is what makes me so curious...and yeah, do keep posting pictures of you smiling. Those pictures makes people like me forget his troubles for a while.. as the song goes...
"cant take my eyes off you"
Anyways, if any of you like watching Batman(the Nolan version which stars Cristian Bale) then you probably know that this year, the last part of the trilogy will be out, titled Batman: the Dark Knight Rises.
We know there will be Batman, Catwoman and Bane(the villain who defeated batman in the comics and puts him out of commission for a while). What I am really interested in is if Nolan will make the storyline similar to the comics because if he does then when Bane defeated Batman, another Batman will replace the current Batman for a while, and this is where Batman really gets the title Dark Knight.
In the comics, After Batman fell, Azrael replace him and assume the role of Batman in which he fought Bane and wins.. See why I am exited? because it is Azrael...
Its gonna be a long shot, but Joseph Gordon Lewitt's role is yet to be determine, He may either be the Riddler, Catman, Azrael or some other secret character which we all know Nolan, he will have surprises waiting in all his Batman movies.
Both Batman and Azrael are my favourite characters in this comic series. If there's a miracle to be witness in 2012, I wont ask for much,haha, just make Azrael replace Batman and let him kick Bane's Ass!!!
The
original song was sang by "the cure" if I am not mistaken. However there’s 2
versions I would like to share with you, one version is by 311 and the other is
by Adele. Hard to find singers like Adele these days, her songs are good.Which version do you like?
There was a
time where I was known as the fixer, during my nakal days that is. Whenever a
friend needs to break up with his gf, they would call on me for help. Yup, not
the kind of fixing you may have thought of at first right? This is I guess, a
bad kind of fix. Back in MMU, one example of this is when my housemate wanted
to breakup with his gf at the time, why? Because he was bored. However, he couldn’t
find a way to tell her off properly so I had to give him a “LIVE support” .
“Live” as
in on the spot assistance to break up with his gf. One time he was talking with
her on the phone and the girl was so mushy mushy with him and he pretended to
be mushy mushy with her on his end but I was there beside him witnessing the
whole thing. When I stepped in to help, I gave him word by word on what to say
to his gf, using the typical “it’s not you, it’s me “excuse.
To make it
even more convincing, I even told him to act the part, when I say to put on a
sad voice, he put on a sad voice, when I say pretend to shed tears, he
pretended to shed tears. Hmmm at this time, I use my skills to bad use
actually. The method worked, they broke off without her hating him so much and
after he put down the phone, he laughed at said thanks to me. I pretended to
laugh back but I actually do feel bad for the girl being played like that but
yeah, I know I’m still at fault for helping a friend to do something bad.
However,
I’m not all that bad la ok... I think I have helped friends break up with GF as
much as I have helped friends get the girls they want so ok lah I guess. When they
see no hope, I see as something easy to do, just like the movie Hitch starring
Will Smith. I just know how to connect the dots.
If only I
can do the same for myself. I don’t know why, maybe its punishment for all the
bad things I’ve done, people will always come to me for help and Its easy for
me to help them even though the situation looks very tough, but somehow, I find
it hard to help myself when I am in similar situation.
I guess one
of the main reasons for me to help is because I like to see the look on their
faces as they get help when they think there is little to no hope to remedy the
situation, I wanted to know how it felt when you get to see that miracle
happening. If I can’t get my own miracle, At least I can be that for others.
I’ve always
got their back when they fall down, but when I fall, who has
got my back?
On an unrelated topic, Damn ..she is
beautiful, even better without make up… well at least she falls under the other
50% of women population who has natural beauty.
This is one of the music videos that I will post with the actual video clip and not lyrics by fans or something. This is because the video clip really matches the music. I hope you have heard of this song, if you didn't, then thank god you do now :) .
Watching the video reminds me of the times when I use to take videos with my buddies back during those years. I like taking videos, because videos captures more details than a camera could ever do. Back then I knew I would miss those moments when I get older and that's why I try to record every moment worth remembering. Memories somehow plays more role as you grow older, so if you are young and currently enjoy life, why not buy a handycam and record that smile, cry, laughter and all those stupid things you do with your close friends because those are the memories you would not want to forget as you grow, when you get caught up with the hectic working environment that you will bound to have.
"Here's to the tears you knew you would cry"
Some of us sometimes wander if what we have now would last forever, whether its friendship, love, your favorite hobby, anything. As you get older, Some of your questions will be answered. An example would be back then, when I was taking videos during a bbq I have with my buddies along with my gf back then, I thought our relationship would last, but when I look back at that video now, "we", didn't work out, and its those kind of stuff that somehow makes you wiser. I did look at the video with a smile knowing even though we are no longer an item, we did have a lot of great time, and that is the kind of memories you should remember and not the pain and suffering you experience during the break up.
"I want to ditch the logical"
I like the sentence above which was taken from this song. Time has made me become more of a realist, a person who now chooses to see from the "what's real and in front of you" than the what if and imaginary perspectives. Sometimes, now more often than not, I want to ditch the logical. Away from being able to predict and expect everything, to taking a dive into the unknown, just go with the flow kind of situation. Who cares if I am unprepared, not ready and afraid as it is on those situations that I manage to get the best moments in life that I cherish until now.
"Don't let me let you go"
Let me bring my full hd videocam and I'll show you what memories are made of. You don't need to make up, pose or find a good background like you would need to if you are taking photos using a camera. Leave that to the professional photographers who will capture your image as how you want the public to remember you by. When taking videos, its more personal than that. All you need to do is be yourself as that is the real you and the you that you want to remember years from now :)
Title : One Republic - Secret (Cover by Piano Guys,Ochestra/cello)
Memory Accessed Date : 2003,2012
Thought I write something now as in the morning I have to go Bangsar for some task needs doing and some shop named La CeCe Cheechah in Kota Damansara or something during tea time .
If you like one republic's "secret" then be prepared to be blown away when you hear this version. go ahead press play...Now if you are in your room alone, then close your eyes and imagine. Imagine anything that makes you happy and at peace.
I think I have mention before that not many know the real me, one classic example was this moment back in 2003 I think. I was in the library and sitting in front of me was this girl( I didn't know at the time she was the smartest Malay girl in management course, always getting either 3.9 or 4 flat. Anyways she was reading some book while I was pretending to read some books(well i tried but couldn't concentrate) and at the time she was hearing to some music on her cd player(Ipod 1 wasn't available just yet) and at one point she stop and we chatted for a while.
I ask her whether what she was listening to was by Mozart, and she said yes, with a very surprised look on her face. She asked me whether I listen to Mozart and the likes. I said, "you mean classical and baroque type of music? sure I love to listen to them" and to cut the story short, she started to like me but the feeling wasn't mutual, I respected her as a good friend, nothing more. People think a "Jock" looking guy like me would go for the typical Linkin Park, Bon Jovi, rock, heavy metal, altenative... Sure I like them, but that just 1 side of me, theres more to me than what you see on the outside.
Theres one thing I wanna share bout me that people don't know. There is a phrase that goes like this, the eyes are the windows to the soul. Somehow whenever I talk to women, I don't look at them in the eye, at least not for a long time. I don't know why, but maybe I'm afraid if the saying is true and if so,what if when they look at me straight in the eyes and see what I don't want them to see...
Hmm, one good thing at least is that someone has finally updated her status, slightly injured, but ok in a way I guess.
I remembered back in 1999, when I went for an Interact IU day in SMK Sultan Abdul Samad and hearing this song being played. Interact days were one of the best days of my life. It was when I learn to speak and communicate properly, especially to the opposite gender. I also hold the position of Asst IU director, pretty cool title, with almost no work at all. hahaha
There were a few hot chics there, one in particular but I couldn't remember her name. A friend took a photo of her though... she ought to be 30 now, this year.. probably married with a kid or something. Those were the days..
For those who is about to hear this song for the first time, then dedicate the next 4 minutes or so hearing to this wonderful song. Sounds like an old skool music but believe me, its good music.
Later, around 2.30pm me and my cycling team will be having a simulation run with PDRM, we on our bicycles and them on their horses. cant wait for this thing to end.
Anyways, someone is being pretty quiet lately.. hmmm..
I remembered hearing this song when I first entered MMU. Never liked third eye blind much but this song is one of the good ones. Saw this Eurasian Malay chic, dubbed the hottest chic at one point, tried to get closed to her, failed! she was so into her bf at that time and didn't bother talking to anyone else, I mean really, she didn't bother talking to any other guy besides her bf. Talk about loyalty to the end.
However, her loyalty back fired when her bf slept with one of her good friends(another hot but wild,very wild chic). She was devastated, everybody could tell. She broke down, decided to go indulge in an eating therapy, gained a few(quite a few) pounds and lock herself in her room for quite some time coz I don't see her around much at campus.
One things for sure, Her bf is one stupid S.O.B to do that to such a person. Actually its good when a girl can resist temptation of other guys when she already has a bf. A quality I rarely see from most girls that I come in contact with. How do I know? Coz I had the chance to be the bad many times, but I stop because I just wanted to test them, to see if they would jump if I tell them to, and they would.
I hate that. One of my fears is when my future GF(if ever that will happen again) will meet a guy like me, a person would put the relationship to a test. And I hate to find out the answer...
"Everything's so blurry and everyone's so fake, and everybody's empty, and everything is so messed up"
Sometimes when I look back to the person I was, Its funny now to see the person I turn out to be. People tend to change for better, we hear and see this a lot. But the extension to that sentence would be, we can change for the better but that doesn't mean people can accept you for who you have become.
With all the things I have experienced all these years, if there's one thing life has taught me, then it would be "to survive". I tend to get a lot of shit coming my way, not because I like it or did it on purpose, but simple because, I choose a different path. I choose a path of change, change things that I see that doesn't quite fit into the picture, and this causes people to dislike me even if they themselves agree with me on the matter. They like the way they are, they like things to not change. But the best part of all, the change I wanted to bring is something they have been wanting to have but when it appears in front of them, they are afraid to grasp it.
Its easy to point fingers, easy to live your life and ignore the things that could harm us. Yes we can do this and not be affected, but the question is, for how long shall we be ignorant towards something we see that is not right?
I not not talking about anything political or anything heavy like that, but I'm sure all of us has been in a similar situation before even if you are the type of person who always choose to see the brighter side of things. Sometimes people need to learn the hard way. Sometimes people need to experience a great loss before they start to change.
I have been there, and the regret is something that will haunt me. Its a mistake I wish not to repeat and because of that I now realize, we are who we choose to become. I am somebody you have always wanted to have standing beside you, protecting you, but once you have me, can you accept me for who I really am and stand by my side as I would stand by yours?
Whenever I listen to 311's Amber, I just feel like I'm in Hawaii or something. One of the few reggae like tunes I enjoy listening to. Keeps you calm and collected. A good song to listen to early in the mornin, especially if you are driving to work and you are stuck in the jam, or when I first listen to this song, I was preparing for my final exam back in 2005.
Come on, relax, take a chill pill and just let 311's work its magic on ya.
There's a few more songs from them that's good but really underrated, I'll post them later on. Till then, enjoy then music.
Creep by Radiohead. Seriously, if you haven't heard this song because you missed this era then here you go. I heard this when I was hmmm 15/16 I think but its a song I've been always wanting to dedicate to someone but never found a suitable candidate.
Now , I do have a someone to dedicate this song to. This song fits perfectly to our situation, word for word. Its a song a guy would dedicate to a girl he knows he could not get. Haha.. not sounding like a loser(hmmm ) but if there exist a place where I can express myself then let this blog be it. I maybe a so called Casanova, getting girls I want to like me but as good as I am, I'm not match for you.(cheh, giving up before trying.. so not my style)
So I'm dedicating this song to you. You are out there, being busy I guess considering you are a public figure and guys are practically lining up to date you.
If you do somehow reached here and guessing whether am I talking about you then just know the answer is simply, yes.
Not many
would think about this question but out of curiosity, if you were to ask this
question, “How would you like to leave this world?” what would you answer? I
did asked myself that question before, and macam macam jawapan keluar. However,
being imaginative, if I were to be able to choose, then I would like it to be
like “the notebook’s ending”, how both of them holding hands and lying on the
bed together.
Storyline-
A poor and passionate young man falls in love with a rich
young woman and gives her a sense of freedom. They soon are separated by their
social differences.
Even if I am sharing
the ending scene and the best scenes with you, it doesn’t change the fact that
you should watch the movie if you haven’t. Hell, in the spirit of good movies,
contact me and I’ll give you the movie over the internet! The whole movie is an
experience you will not want to forget..
The
notebook is one of the finest romance movies of the century, no shit. I am a
guy and I don’t cry(hey.. that rhymes) but after watching the notebook, daaaammmmmmmittttttt….
“I am nothing
special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life.
There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But
in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've
loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been
enough.”
